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Seeing the face of God

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Then Moses says, “Now show me your glory.”

And the Lord said, “I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the Lord, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion. But,” he said, “you cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live.”

— Exodus 33:18-20

One of the greatest moments of cinematic history comes at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark. The Nazis have captured and tied up Indy and Marion and taken back the Ark of the Covenant. And then they decide to open it. At first all they find is dust. But then lightning starts to appear from inside. The Germans’ car lights and film equipment blow out. Indy tells Marion to shut her eyes and keep them closed. Ghost-like spirits flood out of the Ark, swirling all around and attacking them. Light shoots from Ark, piercing the Nazi soldiers. The ones standing next to it start screaming as their faces melt off. The German priest literally explodes. When the light finally subsides and the Ark is closed again, Indy opens his eyes. They’ve survived, but everyone else is dead.


This weekend, I heard someone talk about the passage above from Exodus. In it, Moses is in the desert talking with God. Aaron and the Israelites had built a golden calf to worship, and Moses had naturally become very angry with them. He begged God to forgive them. God told Moses to lead the Israelites to the Promised Land but said He wouldn’t be going with them because they’re a stubborn and rebellious people and He would probably destroy them at some point along the way. (As a sidenote, I can totally relate to this as a parent.) Moses then asks for reassurance, and God tells him He will look favorably on them. But that’s not enough for Moses. He wants to see God’s glory. He wants to see God’s face to know for sure that everything is going to be OK. God replies that He’ll show them mercy and compassion, but as for seeing His face, that’s out of the question. To see God’s face, to experience the fullness of His glory would be too much for Moses to handle, and he would die.

The past two months have been some of the hardest of my life. In October, just a few weeks shy of our 20th anniversary, Christy told me she thought we should get a divorce. The strain of the past year along with numerous issues that have been present in our relationship since the beginning had become too much to bear. We’ve spent the time since then working through things. It’s been slow and painful and not always certain. At many times during the process I felt like all I had left was God. I had lost everything else. My parents were gone. My job was (is) in a state of uncertainty. And now I was on the brink of losing my wife and possibly my kids and house. All I had left, the only thing I could count on and cling to, was God. I needed Him desperately. I cried out for his reassurance. I needed to know it was going to be OK.

A thousand-plus years after Moses died, God’s face was finally revealed. But it didn’t happen on a mountaintop, it happened in a dirty manger in the middle of nowhere. The Word became flesh and “we have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14). Only this time instead of bringing death, it brought life. Abundant life (John 10:10). And not just life now but life for eternity (Romans 6:23). The face of God was there on the cross when the Word that had become flesh gave Himself up for my sin so that I wouldn’t have to. And now instead of saying, “You cannot see my face and live,” God says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).

Over the past two months, God has shown me His goodness. In the midst of my pain, He’s poured out His unimaginable compassion and mercy. He hasn’t turned away from me or left me to wander the desert alone but instead gone with me. I’ve felt the weight of His glory, and it’s overwhelming. I’ve seen His face, and it’s beautiful.

Merry Christmas.


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